October in Review
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| Sunrise at the youth camp |
It seems as if October is always one of the busiest months. Yes, slightly overwhelming, but exciting at the same time.
|| THE WORDS
what I’ve been writing and some quotes I love
I'm not going to lie, I haven't written a lot in October. (Feels extremely guilty.)
Here's something I wrote during worship at camp:
Here's something I wrote during worship at camp:
…
little did I know
the darkness inside
ate my up bit by bit
leaving me with broken shattered pieces
that I’ll never be able to put back
no matter how I try
…
I know I’m not perfect
slightly broken, lonely
but this time I don’t hide it to myself
instead I turn to him and ask for aid.
||THE ARTS
some artsy things I did
I did make some videos for camp. And I'll be posting the one I like the most on YouTube soon. But as for arts and crafts, I realized I didn’t do any of that...
However, I do have a few cool photos I took this month:
However, I do have a few cool photos I took this month:
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| Seoul- Hongdae |
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| Anna K. <3 |
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| Chloe D. <3 |
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| Sunrise at the Youth Camp |
what I’ve been thinking about
I decided to take a break and "protest/revenge" to the people who barely replied to my text at the end of September and the beginning of October as I was extremely frustrated at social media. I turned off the notification of my WeChat, and I didn't post anything or text any of my friends unless they texted me first (which they barely did). Few weeks passed by and I slowly returned back on social media.
I hate to admit it but through those few weeks, I only discovered the power of social media and how it has inevitably taken a big part of our life. I realized that I can't simply run away from it to avoid the anxiety it brings. So it's been a challenge for me to worry less when people start not replying to my message.
I remember hearing my youth pastor said at camp, “Failure is when the Lord calls you to do something but you don't do it, instead of 'failing' to finish God’s work. ” That really encouraged me because I often fear that I'm a failure because I got a bad SAT score, or that I will be a failure if I don't get into college. Human's standard to judge a person's worth might be important and have a big impact on life, but I feel like it's important to remember that the standard of God is different from people and what really matters is God's standard, not the world's.
Also, this is a bit less serious... but I feel like words spread around quickly, whether it's said or unsaid. There's no real secret in the world.
|| THE SONGS
what music I have been listening to
Saturn – Sleeping At Last
Do I even need to explain why this song is amazing?
Do I even need to explain why this song is amazing?
Bird with a Broken Wing – Owl City
I’m not a rock song person, but as I was searching for songs with ambiguous lyrics for my English assignment, I came across this song, and I absolutely love the lyrics. Someone should cover this song and make an acoustic version of it.
Who You Say I Am - Hillsong Worship
One of the favorite song we sang at camp
God Only Knows - for KING & COUNTRY
I don't know, their songs just give me chills.
Gravity - John Mayer
Feels like it's a perfect song to listen at night or before going to sleep.
Who You Say I Am - Hillsong Worship
One of the favorite song we sang at camp
God Only Knows - for KING & COUNTRY
I don't know, their songs just give me chills.
Gravity - John Mayer
Feels like it's a perfect song to listen at night or before going to sleep.
|| THE SPARKLES
some small things I’ve been enjoying and the memories
Shopping in my favorite Korean stationery store.
Trying to take a nap for ten minutes and end up sleeping for two hours.
Playing the keys at worship while sitting on a skateboard with three extra cushions on top.
Friends asking me if they could join me sitting on the stairs during lunch at camp. Yes, it sounds really simple and normal but I was always the one who went around looking for people to sit with and end up sitting by myself during meal time.
Sitting in the main room while the worship team practice and just chilling.
People applauding after my video was played.
Finally sending in the Early Decision.
Trying to take a nap for ten minutes and end up sleeping for two hours.
Playing the keys at worship while sitting on a skateboard with three extra cushions on top.
Friends asking me if they could join me sitting on the stairs during lunch at camp. Yes, it sounds really simple and normal but I was always the one who went around looking for people to sit with and end up sitting by myself during meal time.
Sitting in the main room while the worship team practice and just chilling.
People applauding after my video was played.
Finally sending in the Early Decision.
|| THE DOINGS
what I’ve been up to this month
I went to Korea to take the SAT test at the beginning of the month. Although I didn’t end up with the score I wanted, I knew it was time to let go and focus on the application itself. I actually met a friend from Beijing in Seoul so that was pretty fun. I got to hang out with my Korean bestie as well, and meeting her made me relax from all the stresses I got from the test and schools and gave me a time just to have some fun.
Right after I got back from Korea, I needed to work on the decorations and videos for the camp. Those two weeks went by fast with the midterm coming up. Filming and editing the videos wasn't easy but I had fun. Intimidated by all the works that I needed to finish, like school, videos, college applications, I was terrified and became scared that I wouldn't be able to finish them on time. Looking back right now, I see that God was with me, without him, I don't know how I would have finished all those works.
Camp was great.
I got there on Friday night, which was my first time ever going to camp before the day. I decorated the room with Candice, which I was so blessed to have, she's truly amazing (WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN A PHOTO TOGETHER).
I also...
I just finished applying Early Decision, and I had a few big homework due that day as well. I started to doubt myself and low key panic about whether I could make through the day but I did.
As for the results, I'm really not confident whether I'll make it into the college, because it's really selective and my application is pretty average in my opinion. While their acceptance rate is 20%, I feel like I only have about 5% of chances getting into that college. Ah well, I still have Regular Decisions if I don't get in.
Camp was great.
I got there on Friday night, which was my first time ever going to camp before the day. I decorated the room with Candice, which I was so blessed to have, she's truly amazing (WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN A PHOTO TOGETHER).
I also...
- took photos, which makes a good excuse for me to be absent from the game as I'm not a game person.
- met my TPS buddy, Daniel R..
- watched people chase around chickens
- talked till late at night with my friends
- hiked up the mountain to see the sunrise.
Besides the "entertainments" the camp also made me think a lot... about God's kingdom on earth. About how we could start small changes and bring God's kingdom to earth through using our talent and the help of the holy spirit.
I just finished applying Early Decision, and I had a few big homework due that day as well. I started to doubt myself and low key panic about whether I could make through the day but I did.
As for the results, I'm really not confident whether I'll make it into the college, because it's really selective and my application is pretty average in my opinion. While their acceptance rate is 20%, I feel like I only have about 5% of chances getting into that college. Ah well, I still have Regular Decisions if I don't get in.
||THE FUTURE
what I plan (or at least try) to do in the upcoming month
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| Taken by Grace Z. |
I’m actually planning to switch my blog to wordpress.org from Blogspot in the coming month since I want to continue blogging as a long-term and I want people to read my blog without the need of VPN. And I can't really customize anything with Blogspot, which is driving me crazy. We’ll see how that goes.
AND I’m planning on doing Nano Writing Month, I’m positively sure I’ll fail the competition but hopefully, it’ll motivate (force) me to write the story that has been sitting in my computer for months.
I’ll be starting to direct another play for Christmas; I’m really excited about it. And I can’t wait to have fun with my little actors. Speaking of which I have a play to translate in two days...
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So that's my October in Review! I hope you guys enjoyed it <3 November, here we go.
Oh and shoutout to Rebekah R. who gave me the inspiration to write this blog post!
I love your works!!!
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